Tuesday, May 28, 2013

I saved the world again, and no one will ever know...unless they read my blog

I have been driving myself nuts in my management course with this week's quiz. I took it 4 times.

The first time I scored a 90%. UNACCEPTABLE!

I was disgusted with myself. I got one wrong? Idiot! Steve meanwhile is standing behind me saying, "90% is great! That's amazing!"

"NO! I must retake the quiz."

The second try I got 80%. What the fuck?! NOOOOOO!!!! That explains why there are clouds over Southern California this morning- the world is coming to an end. Isn't idiocy one of the signs of the apocalypse? No? It should be.

I immediately took the quiz a third time and got back to my 90%. Still unacceptable, but less unacceptable than an 80%.

Here's the thing that is so ridiculous. When Ian comes home and says he got a 70% on a test, I'm over the moon. He sat down and actually took a test! He followed instructions and answered questions! That's amazing! He's a genius!

When Lauren comes home with a 40% on a test, I'm thinking, hey, she got a couple right. That's pretty impressive. She's actually making an effort at something.

But for me, 90% might as well be a 0. A big fat loser grade. I'm not top of the class, well then, shoot me now. I'm not worthy.

Instead, I got on the elliptical and exercised. And as the sweat started to drip, I suddenly realized something. When I changed the answer to the question I couldn't find the answer to in the book, I got an 80%. When I changed it back to what I originally thought, I got a 90% again. THAT'S NOT THE QUESTION I'M GETTING WRONG! It's that other one. That other one is not asking what I think it's been asking. It's a tricky son of a bitch!

So I went back and did the quiz again. This time, I got a 100%. Oh look, the sun is trying to come out to play.

And that's how I saved the world this morning. You're welcome.

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